If you’ve battled addiction, you understand that its devastation extends far beyond the physical. It lies in the relationships that shifted, the trust that was tested, and the moments you wish you could undo. That’s where making amends comes in. It’s one of the hardest yet most important steps in a 12-step program. Let’s face it—addiction changes people. It pushes you to say and do things you never imagined possible, often hurting the ones who care about you the most. And when the haze of substance use finally lifts, you’re left to confront the reality of what’s been done.
At Woodland Recovery Center, we help you face that reality, not with shame or guilt but with the tools to make things right. Learning how to make amends is about taking responsibility, showing real change, and rebuilding trust one step at a time.
Making Amends in Recovery
Making amends isn’t just about saying, “I’m sorry.” It’s about taking real, meaningful action to fix the harm caused by active addiction. Apologies are important, but they’re not enough if they’re not backed up by change.
In a 12-step program, making amends is a key part of AA step 9: “Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.” This step encourages clients to own their past, make things right where they can, and commit to being different moving forward. The point is that making amends is about feeling better and being better. It’s about proving, through action, that you are no longer the person you were in active addiction.
Making Amends Examples
Learning how to make amends looks different for everyone. Some situations are straightforward, like paying back money or apologizing for missing important moments. Others are more complicated, especially if the people involved are no longer in your life or don’t want to hear from you.
Here are some examples of how making amends can play out:
- To a friend or family member – Maybe you lied, stole, or let them down one too many times. Making amends might mean sitting down with them, acknowledging the harm caused, and showing them, through consistent action, that things are different now.
- To an employer – Maybe you lost a job due to addiction or burned bridges at work. Making amends might mean reaching out to apologize, offering to fix any lingering issues, or simply making sure you show up responsibly in your new job.
- To a child or loved one you hurt emotionally – Words alone won’t fix broken trust. Making amends might mean being patient, proving yourself over time, and respecting their need for space while you work to rebuild the relationship.
- To yourself – Addiction takes a toll, and sometimes, the hardest person to forgive is yourself. Making amends here means treating yourself with kindness, committing to your recovery, and building a life that doesn’t revolve around past mistakes.
Not every amends will be accepted. Some people may not be ready to forgive, and that’s okay. What matters is that you take the steps to make things right where you can and learn how to live in a way that doesn’t cause more harm.
Contact Woodland Recovery Center Today and Find Healing with Our 12-Step Program
At Woodland Recovery Center, our 12-step program is designed to help you navigate recovery, take accountability, and rebuild your life, one step at a time. We know that addiction affects more than just the person struggling. It impacts families, friendships, careers, and self-worth. That’s why our approach focuses on healing the damage that addiction left behind.
Through group therapy, personal counseling, and the 12 steps, we help clients take responsibility for their past while building a future that’s stronger and healthier. Whether you’re just beginning your recovery or working on the next steps, our team is here to guide you through the process in a way that makes sense for you. Call us at 662.222.2989 or sign up using the online form.
